Quotes 2019
This whole wiki situation is a bit of a mess, but people only go to it for the quotes page anyway, so here's the new one! Remember, please use the format "Quote" - Person and put the quote under the correct subheading to make it easier and more consistent to read. For each individual course, please use Sub-heading 2 (CTRL+4). If you put obscure quotes into General then they will just be moved into In-Jokes. You can toggle italics on and off using CTRL+I (or CMD+I on Mac). (RIP QUOTES PAGE 2018 (2018-2019)) Session 1 General Interest Students * "It's not blackmail if it's facts" - Rhys * "I have a list of racial slurs for D and D" - Fionn * "I will put all of you to sleep and I will castrate Emmet" - Rhys * "I will avenge Emmet's testicles" - Patrick * "Your pen is anorexic" - Niall * "It's bread, get over yourself" - Josh * "Let me use my bits!" - Catherine * "I wanna be the prostitute" - Almarose * "Stop fingering my snapple bottle" - Darragh * "Then I jumped up a yelled 'spank my ass and call me Sally'" - Darragh * "My grandad's called Margaret" - Eibhlin * "Hypocrisy is the most important thing in life" - Oscar * "He's the sexiest plant alive" - Mathew * "Michael looks like a stripper" - Muhammad * "What's wrong with homosexual gremlins?" - Mathew * "I hate white things" - Alex 2: Electric Boogaloo * "That's how you know it's fresh from the Chinese Workshop" - Naoise * "I wanted to be nice so I gave him a gun" - Oscar * "He wants it harder" - Almarose * "We had a group Smash in Public" - Rhys * "Peer pressure is sometimes good" - Callum * "That has the same bouncing consistency as a small child" - Cormac * "Imagine you're bouncing on a small child" - Cormac * "I never have any quotes" - Fionn * "I like chewy coffee" - Reuben * "Smash attacks are more effective on children" - Patrick * "It's annoying when you digest your own head. It really messes up your hair" - Darragh * "Everyone can we get your attention please" - RAs "No" - Michael * "Remember kids, consent is not the absence of a no, it's the absence of consciousness" - Rhys * "He'll be expecting us to kill him while he's sleeping, but he'll never be expecting us to kill him while he's dead. I mean, he's dead, so why would we kill him? So the plan is to kill him first, and THEN ''we kill him" - Rhys * "Some people are afraid of being watched by stalkerish ducks" - Kian * "Gandhi and the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse" - Pádraig * "Cock and Ball Torture" - Sean's RA group *"Let's all just fist each other, let's just pound it out" - Rhys *"Don't lose Zero Nil" - Rhys *"How does one do a 'Sports'?" Rhys *"The amount of sugar and caffeine is directly proportional to skill" - Rory *"Ahh, I can't use my left hand" - Fionn *"To be fair, we're segregating them by RA group, not by sex" - Rhys *(Talking to the legendary RA Greg)”It’s not weird if your eyes are closed“ - Fionn *"Has anyone got any tissue, I need to make tits" - Jack *(About the fish from shark tale) "Mm I would" -Ronan *"Are the IRA like, banned or something?" - Anu *"If you have a LONG, STRONG thumbnail" - Eva *"You wanna be purple? Cause I'll purple your... penis" - Anu *"I wanna be cooked, I wanna be made into a meal!" - Emma, describing her own wake *"Please sir, spare craic?" - Maya *"This is me when do handjob" - Anu, stroking Emma's shoulder *"You can't just do things like this and expect it to be okay" - Emma, in reference to Anu's awful syntax *"It makes the bitches go undone al the time" - Emma *"Give me your finest pleasure, and make it snappy" - Emma, in a strong Victorian accent *"I just want some Dunne's mascarpone sauce" - Bubbles, tearing up *"Waloweegee" - Anu, trying to spell Waluigi *"I think it's telling of how much CTYI feed you that I didn't need a belt for these trousers 3 weeks ago" - Páidí *"I wish I had a menstrual cup so I could... sip sip" - Maya Courses CTYI Computer Science * CTYI Game Theory *"But hey, that's just a theory! A GAME Theory! Thanks for Watching." - The Whole Class *"Animals (Kids)" - Fionn *"Some say fire hazard, I say fire opportunity" - Alex the 3rd *"We should change the Irish national anthem to Megalovania" - Matthew *"It sounds like a biblical version of Klingon (said about Modern Hebrew)" - Matthew *"When is it bad to be early? Oh wait, sex, yeah I walked into that one" - Rhys *"That's too many fingers" - Emmet *"Muhammad Bin Laden" - Emmet, who didn't know who Muhammid Ali was *"Who's going to be able to suck for that long?' - Kian *"Do you think Pádraig Mac Piarais knew what a Kazoo was?" - Rhys *"Keanu, who would you like to give Happiness and Pleasure?" - Pádraig *"They should choke each other out with their Lanyards" - Rhys, discussing an RA Battle Royale *"I'm too lazy to have OCD" - Páidí *"A pop vinyl Thanos snapped away half the toys in Toy Story 4" - Emmet *"It's like a water sandwich" - Fionn *"Ninja is like Irish Mammy Simulator; you give everyone a good slap on the wrist" - Rhys *"Has anyone got a spare fly?" - Kian *"I'm surprised I don't have any quotes" - Michael *"I love a good ol' four way sometimes" - Fionn *"Normally I wouldn't do a fourway but today I'll make an exception" - Fionn *"40 is infinity" - Rhys *"Does this count as a Chess Battle Royale?" - Pádraig *"Remember to always wear protection when playing Chess" - Rhys *"Pirate Business-Casual" - Michael *"How is signing my delete fortnite petition too political for you but killing me over money isn't?" - Rhys *"I could snort that cookie"- Michael *"Snorting cookies gives you superpowers, do it" - Elisa *"Everyone touch it with your finger...don't repeat that" - Michael *"Any play thing in Toy Story is alive, so are Dildos alive?" - Rhys *"All I wanted to do was watch 'The Big Bang Theory'" - Alex 2: Electric Boogaloo *"How hard is it to fill a hole?" - Rhys *""Asexual reproduction" ah yes, my area of expertise" -Michael *"I have arms, don't listen to me" - Michael *"Make Robots, not children" - Páidí *”Why not put it in the toaster” - Finn CTYI Novel Writing * CTYI Philosophy *"You know what that is? ''Propaganda" - ''Niall *"But what about your religion?" - Niall *"Hypothetically speaking, I am oil" - Anu *"It's kinda like an uno reverse card" - Samuel, in reference to WWIII *"Eva's a furry" - everyone *"I'm not a furry" - Eva *"Hypothetically, say you met a gorilla that ''could give consent..." - Aidan *"Can bestiality be veganly justified?" - Emma *"I wanna be punished" - Anu *"Sociocrats" - Niall, trying to pronounce Socrates *"Which one of you little SHITS is implementing COLOURED BORDERS around the text? Because it WASN'T me and it WON'T GO AWAY" - Eva *"Whole lotta woman" - Rossi *"What should the punishment be?" "REMOVE THEIR TOES" - Fiachra *"They're all in the holospital" - Anu *"So you're two fifths of a lesbian?" - Fiachra *"I'm homeless, unemployed, single and I've got no kids, but hey -- the way I see it is: Opportunity. Opportunity. Opportunity" ''- Aidan *"It's not genocide it's just mass non-consensual euthanasia" - Fiachra *"I will vore animal feet" - Fiachra *"Milk, the famous civil rights leader" - Aidan *"Aristotle cut his own dick off because it wasn't virtuous enough" - Avril *"So about the hair and dirt thing..." - everyone *"Yeah yeah yeah! Like a single molecule of water in a cup in a desert" - Niall, frantically trying to make an analogy for war *"I don't fear death" - Eoghan CTYI Robotics └∵┌└[ ∵ ]┘┐∵┘ *"These quotes are terrible" - Niall *"This kid looks like a school shooter" -Niall *https://drive.google.com/open?id=1c1UwlJ5c5PZCCj5Ka_YvN3XdQrXdjaLF -Reuben CTYI Child Psych A * "GDPR stands for uhh.. Good Dog (Poodle) Run! It's like a marathon exclusively for good poodles." -Adam * "I'm actually a practising catholic and would feel uncomfortable doing crucifix man -John TI "Do a Protestant crucifix" -Cónán * "Eudaimonic- the happiness you get from a female sheep" -Eva S * "This is wholesome hour: the beta version| -Sadhbh D * "How can we make the world a better place?" -John TI "Nuke the whales" -Eva S * "First and last time I'll ever get with a county player" -Eva S * "No homo is subjective" -Adam * "It's dick or nothing. Dick or die" -Caelan RAs, Teachers and TAs *"Do not be scared by my scary face" - Brian *"We have a giver and a receiver" - Brian *"I think a little alien influence is good for all of us" - Brian *"Mathematically, he's the lady's man" - Brian *"The sweet smell of Ballymun" - Kel *"Killing you isn't political, it's just to bring me great hapiness" - Brian *"You have to take advantage of people's altruism" - Brian *"It's not racist, it's generic" - Greg *"Roll a double a couple times and out go the nuclear bombs" - Brian *"Iran said 'Hey Europe, help us out here' and Europe was like 'Nah'" - Brian *"I'm younger than 60, that's your only clue" - Brian *"Mace Windu dominates Obi-Wan and Yoda" - Brian * "Cock and Ball Torture is now banned" - Seán * "Salt in CTYI is not a civil rights issue" - Ryan * “I don’t think mayonnaise is a civil rights issue“- Kel * "Josh buys Delphine's Bath Water apparently" - Greg * 'Snapple is 100× more powerful than Coke' - Student, "You mean Coca Cola, yeah?" - Greg * (talking about sticking a knife in toaster )”I’ve done that” - Kel * “Nothing but lanyard“ - Greg * "Capitalism is literally the worst" -John TI * "Y'all know correlation?" *whips* -John TI * "Don't drink underage because it's scauldy as hell" -John TI * "This is my last life, everything has no meaning and I am ''out" - Sam, TI * "I have a deep-seated hatred for the US" - Sam, TI In-Jokes *"Rigorous Group Smash" - The Bros. who love a good wholesome Group Smash *"We're only racist against purple and green people" - Fionn's D and D group *"...playing with our COCs..." - Dylan, Fionn and Pádraig *"I rolled a nut 20" - Daithí *"Would you like to sign my petition to delete fortnite?" - Rhys *”Let’s have a vote on castrating Emmet“ - A D&D group hosted in the room of a certain Pádraig *"Get your fucking tits out" - Eva, Anu, Bubbles, Emma, Maya & co. Session 2 General Interest Students Courses RAs, Teachers and TAs In-Jokes